Um... hmmm. So, there's new music out. Something we all need in these "trying times". And this Friday, it's something for the girls, boys, and suburbanites. We've got Chappell Roan serving country and Lil Nas X crawling out of Flopville (Population: Montero).

"The Giver" - Chappell Roan

I'm not a Chappell Roan fan -- I'll admit that -- but I did watch her SNL performance in November and liked the song she sang at the end. I couldn't find it online except for a bootleg copy on Spotify from one fan (thanks, fan) but today, Roan finally released "The Giver".

Quite reminiscent of Shania Twain or dare I say it, the single mom who works two jobs and loves her kids and never stops, "The Giver" reminds me of something that would have played in the barn party scene in the Hannah Montana Movie . There's just one line that makes me giggle every time: "ain't no country boy, quitter". Am I the only one hearing something else?

Middle America will eat this up, and maybe that's where it goes wrong. It almost feels as if Chappell is at odds with being the tongue-in-cheek lesbian artist while also trying to appeal to bros who yell "roll tide" at Alabama State football games. Gets the job done? Not quite. It's time to clock in, Roan. Let 2025 be the year where queer artists don't have to speak in metaphors.

Flop Verdict: I bored and couldn't finish reviewing.